We cannot be replaced

I came down to WJ for the first time since Labor Day weekend.  School has been so busy that I haven't even had time to think about coming home.  But conference weekend is a big deal at the Sharp home and I wanted to see all of my family so I was set on being here!  On Friday, after my math midterm, I went to the temple to do a session before leaving Logan.  My goal is to go to the temple EVERY week so I had to squeeze it in before the week ended.  It was such a blessing!  I got there early enough that I was able to sit in the chapel for a while and read in the scriptures.  I felt so much peace and joy.  A cute old lady came walking in and asked if she could sit next to me on the front row.  Of course I said yes, to which she replied, "By the third session I am a little tired so if I can sit a little closer I won't have to walk as much."  I was in awe.  This 85+ year old woman was doing her third session of the morning...and I could hardly find time to make it to one session in a week!  At that moment I recommitted to attend every week...no matter what!  Also in my session was a sister receiving her endowment.  She must have been in her 60's and she was surrounded by family and friends.  Seeing the joy that she was experiencing reminded me of receiving my own endowment a few years ago.  The temple is such a blessing!  

I was on the road at noon and the drive through Sardine Canyon was absolutely gorgeous!  The leaves are changing colors and the sun was shining.  I thoroughly enjoyed the drive!  I made a stop in Centerville to see Kelly, Ryan, Landon, Trevor, and baby Zack.  It was soooo wonderful!  I got to hold the baby forever and also be a part of normal life in their home for a few hours.  Those are the moments that I cherish most...the ordinary things.  To me, those are the things that matter most.  

6 week old baby Zack.  He is so sweet!

After Centerville, I stopped at Brooke's and met my Mom there too.  It was super great to see them and Linc and Carter.  Poor Linc is really sick!  I hope that he gets feeling better soon!  At about 6:00 we all congregated at my parent's house to eat some Zupa's and to watch the Aggie vs. BYU game.  It was a fabulous game until the end.  Then it was just tragic!  Better luck next time Aggies!  By the end of the night I was really tired and knew I needed to get to bed early because....I had to get up at 6:30 to be ready to go to General Conference!  Steve had called me the other day and asked me if I wanted to go with him...and of course I did!  We had a great time and conference was marvelous! 

Steve and I at the Conference Center

I was so touched by all of the speakers and prayers and songs, and it was such a privilege to be in the Conference Center with all of the prophets and general authorities, and, of course, to be there with Steve. 

So, I know that this is a long blog post, but I needed to share all of the above mentioned details in order to explain how I am feeling now.  I have been studying the character of Heavenly Father for the past couple of weeks.  I feel like a made a huge break through this weekend.  It all started at the temple.  It hit me that I am a child of God, a daughter of Heavenly Father.  And then, as I was holding Zack, I had this overwhelming feeling come over me.  I made a connection!  I realized that even though Zack is the thirteenth niece or nephew that I have, my love for him isn't any less than what I feel for the other twelve.  That's when it hit me that Heavenly Father feels the same about us.  Sometimes it is hard to fathom that he can love billions and billions of His children, but I realized that He does.  He does not love one of us more than the other.  I also realized, as I spent some time with Lincoln while he was feeling so sick, that Heavenly Father cares for us and wants so bad to help us when we hurt or struggle, because that is how I felt for Lincoln.  I don't know how I have ever thought that Heavenly Father could love me less than another, or care for me less than another, or sometimes want me to suffer.  But that is not in His nature or His character.  We cannot be replaced.  He has always loved us and He always will.  The climax of my weekend was attending conference.  The talks that were given just reaffirmed how I was feeling.  I realized that I have never replaced anyone in my life, no matter how big my circle of family or friends becomes.  I haven't ever had to replace someone because love is not something that runs out.  It is something that increases.  I am so thankful for those who haven't replaced me.  I am especially thankful for a Heavenly Father who is constantly caring for me and will always love me.  I hope that all makes sense...it makes sense in my head, but it is a little difficult to explain in writing!

To end a fabulous day, we visited my Grandma and Grandpa, went to Cafe Rio, picked up some groceries for breakfast tomorrow, and enjoyed time together at home.  I am looking forward to two more sessions of conference!