My Heart Breaks

Meet my Grandma and Grandpa Buchanan.  They are seriously some of the MOST amazing people in the whole world.  Maybe I am a little biased because they are my grandparents, but honestly, they are fabulous!  If you ever get the opportunity to meet them, take it!  Here is a little background:  When I was born they lived in Roosevelt.  We would frequently make trips there to visit them and I just loved that!  When I was almost five and my Mom was pregnant with the twins, my grand parents decided to move to the Salt Lake area to be closer to all of their children and grandchildren.  They actually ended up moving here the day my Mom gave birth to my little brother and sister.  They couldn't move into their new house immediately so they moved in with us.  My Mom and Dad say that was the biggest blessing ever!  With 5 kids and 2 new babies they needed all of the help that they could get.  My Grandma and Grandpa were the best help ever and during the course of them living with us we really became best friends.  After them living with us for a few months, they moved into their own home only a few miles away.  It was quite devastating to me when they were not living with us anymore.  I remember one day when I was 5 I was really bored and I wanted a friend to play with.  My Mom named off 5 or more friends that I could invite over but I didn't really want to play with any of them.  I then turned to my Mom and explained why:  "I want to play with someone fun...like Grandpa!"  My Grandpa is so much fun, always laughing and teasing and always busy doing good.  He can fix anything and he is the hardest worker I know.  My Grandma is so kind.  I have never heard anything negative or crude come out of her mouth or show through in her actions.  She can create the most beautiful things with her hands.  I try everyday to be more like them.  They would be the first ones to say that they have been blessed, but I have also seen how they have endured many hardships.  My Grandpa has gone through four open heart surgeries.  Those were always scary times.  But he is a fighter and his will to live is so strong.  Somehow he has bounced back with each one.  My Grandma has macular degeneration and has lost most of her eyesight and hearing.  It is just heartbreaking for me to see her lose the ability to sew and crochet and knit and bake and cook because of her physical impairments.  I wish that they both could be made all better again.  However, I know that Heavenly Father is aware of them and that they will one day be made whole when they are resurrected.  What an assurance!  

Tonight we went to visit them and drop off some groceries.  Once again, my heart was filled with sorrow as I see them suffering and struggling...I just want to take it all away!  I was reminded that it is not in my power to do that; however, it is my duty to care for them and love them and stay by them.  That is what is going to help them most.  At Christmas time I often get wrapped up in wanting to do some major service for others but I think I often miss the people who need it the most, the people already in my family or sphere of influence.  My grandparents need it most.  I think that we all have people that we know and love that we can serve and help, especially during this beautiful holiday season.  I couldn't help but reflect on this quote given by President Monson in the October 2009 General Conference:

My brothers and sisters, we are surrounded by those in need of our attention, our encouragement, our support, our comfort, our kindness—be they family members, friends, acquaintances, or strangers. We are the Lord’s hands here upon the earth, with the mandate to serve and to lift His children. He is dependent upon each of us.

What a wonderful charge.  What a wonderful responsibility.  My heart may break but it is healed again by the Lord as I try to be His hands.